Did Someone Say "Babies"? by Ogden Nash

Have another address too now... I also post stuff here...
Mashaalein or The Tungsten Torture

Here, though, will be posting stuff that I read here and there...and like, or have liked...

Today, the aforementioned "here and there" would be the new book I bought this evening...
Candy is Dandy - The Best of Ogden Nash

Posted something out of this on Mashaalein, and putting another one that I like here...
Go read First Child...Second Child by Ogden Nash on Mashaalein...


Did Someone Say "Babies"? (This one's for you, Anvita.)

Everybody who has a baby thinks everybody who hasn't a baby ought to have a baby,
Which accounts for the success of such plays as the Irish Rose of Abie,
The idea apparently being that just by being fruitful
You are doing something beautiful,
Which if it is true
Means that the common housefly is several times more beautiful than me or you.
Who is responsible for this propaganda that fills our houses from their attics to their kitchens?
Is it the perambulator trust or the safety pin manufacturers or the census takers or the obstetricians?
Men and women everywhere would have a lot more chance of acquiring recreation and fame and financial independence
If they didn't have to spend most of their time and money tending and supporting two or three unattractive descendants.
We could soon upset this kettle of fish, forsooth,
If every adult would only come out and tell every other adult the truth.
To arms, adults! Kindle the beacon fires!
Women, do you want to be nothing but dams? Men, do you want to be nothing but sires?
To arms, Mr. President! Call out the army, the navy, the marines, the militia, the cadets and the middies.
Down with the kiddies!