'Coz they're the best-est!

I've always thought, since I was 10 years old maybe, that there can be no two people who're as perfect for each other, and with each other, as my parents are. And, I remember wondering if I'll ever meet someone who I'm that good with. (The fact that I did actually find him is another post-in-waiting.)

But, they're the most awesome parents anyone can ever have, or want. My memories of childhood are of only being happy. And, I think, so are my brother's. (Except, in his case, an occasional whack from Mom for not studying.)

They've both always been more my friends than anything else. And, they've both believed in me - blindly - always. And trusted my decisions. And, most importantly, always, always been there after I screwed up.


Mom:
Thanks for making all our family traditions - like, Saahil tying me a rakhi as well, like decorating the Christmas Tree together, like dressing up nicely for Diwali, like cracking up during Diwali pooja just so it doesn't get all serious and stuffy, like making Sunday breakfast with eggs and toast, like singing in the car every time we drove out of town - and so many more.
Thanks for always being my best friend - and knowing me more than I know myself - and, always understanding. Always.
Thanks for reliving everything with me - I know you did.
Thanks for making my shaadi so wonderful.
Thanks for making Saahil and me the people that we are.
Thanks for making our family - the four of us - the completely crazy, madcap, happy family that we are.

Papa:
Thanks for being my biggest support - always. And for being the one person after talking to whom all my confusions clear just like that.
Thanks for being the best, most fun friend and father in the world.
Thanks for reading to me when I was a baby.
Thanks for making fun of our technologically challenged mother with me. :-D
Thanks for always standing up for me. Always, always.
Thanks for the camel story and carpenter story. :)
Thanks for teaching me that there's the right, honourable, truthful way of doing every thing.
Thanks for making me the person I am.
Thanks for making us feel so sure - Mom, Saahil and me - that we could do anything at all, and you'll still always stand by us. With us. Even against the world. Always.

Saahil:
Thanks for making my childhood so fun.
Thanks for being the one person who knows the strangest things about me - and knows my mind the way I know his - inside out.
And, a repeat of the testimonial I wrote for you on Orkut - I think that says best what I want to say - which, by the way, reminds me of asking you WHEN you're going to get around to writing one for me?!

"Brat!
Pest!
...erm...Cheeseling!

...I never thought when we were kids that you'd actually resemble something like a human being eventually - that I'd actually be able to have a conversation with you...ever!

From reading out Biggles to you...and not reading out stories with "metaphors" or literary "illusions"...and definitely NOT reading your favourite author...pretending to be asleep when Mom walked into our room at night, only to have you spoil it all by forgetting to put your head on the pillow...to stealing your money (read: opening a bank account for you)...to have you lending me money now...to dividing even air space on the bed...to understanding your crazy mutant brain...to have you understand me in a way very few people can...to sharing my childhood with you...to becoming the people we both are partly because of each other...

Love you so much!

And, so proud of you - me, Mom and Papa. " (14/06/2007)

Love you all so much.
Thanks for being the most wonderful family in the world. :)

Sphinx Deux

Sun/Flowers

These pretty feet

...are mine.

ek sau solaah chaand ki raatein...ek tumhaare kaandhe ka til...

This is a post that was inspired by something I read on Megha's blog about one of my favourite songs...

Incidentally, the line "ek sau solaah chaand ki raatein, ek tumhaare kaandhe ka til" from the song Mera Kuchh Saamaan from Ijaazat refers to the 116 phases of the moon that are listed in Indian classical literature. What Gulzar means to say is that all the possible phases of brightness that the moon has to offer, cannot even begin to match the tiny dark spot on your shoulder.

Very, very nice, I think. :)

Anyway, thinking about mera kuchh saamaan started me thinking about my favourite Hindi songs - or, some of my favourite Hindi songs, at any rate.

1. Mera Kuchh Saamaan and Katra Katra from Ijaazat
   For RD's awesome music, Asha's awesome voice, and Gulzar's awesome lyrics. For the lines "tumne to aakash bichhaya...mere nange pairo mein zameen hai..." in Katra Katra. And for the aforementioned lines from mera kuchh saamaan.


2. Sona Nahin Naa Sahi from One 2 Ka 4
   For the lines "sona nahin na sahi, chaandi nahin na sahi...fikar kya hai, main hoon na tere liye...". Not great lyrics, I know. But I just love the thought in the song. That, no matter if we have very little, but you have me - always.


3. Hum Aapki Aankhon Mein from Pyaasa
   For the lines "hum aapko khwaabon mein la la ke sataayenge...hum aapki aankhon se neendein hi uDaa dein to...". And for Geeta Dutt's and Rafi's playful, lilting voices.
   
   
4. Tum Pukar Lo and Humne Dekhi Hai Unn Aankhon Ki from Khamoshi
   "muqtasar si baat hai tum se pyaar hai...tumhaara intezaar hai, tum pukaar lo..." from tum pukaar lo. And, "humne dekhi hai, unn aankhon ki mahakati khushboo...haath se chhuuke ise, rishton ka ilzaam na do..." - only Gulzar can write words like "aankhon ki mahakati khushboo". Beautiful! :)


5. Meri Jaan Mujhe Jaan Naa Kaho from Anubhav
   "honth jhuke jab honthon par...saans uljhi ho saanson mein...do judwaan honthon ki...baat kaho aankhon se...". Very sexy words, don't you think?


6. Gulmohar Gar Tumhaara Naam Hota from Devtaa
   "gulmohar gar tumhaara naam hota...mausam-e-gul ko hasaana bhi humaara kaam hota...". Such a nice thought behind the lyrics. Also, 'coz I love Gulmohar trees when they're in full bloom - especially the red ones. Look like fire flowers.


7. Dekh Ke Teri Nazar from Howrah Bridge
   There's this one line in the song, which goes - "aaye ho dho ke kahin aankhein sharaab se" - I don't think any other Hindi film song describes intoxicating, sexy eyes as well.


8. Abhi Naa Jaao ChhoDkar from Hum Dono
   Love this song for its lyrics and music, but more so because this is the first song G sang to me. Not "sang" really - typed. We were chatting and it was very late at night, and I said I had to go sleep - and this is when he said abhi na jaao chhoDke, ke dil abhi bhara nahin...and I said, yehi kahoge tum sada ke dil abhi nahin bhara. And, this was one of those times when I was feeling constantly surprised at how two people who've had such different exposures and lives, have so much in common. I love old Hindi film songs (as is quite evident from this list!), and most people I've known have had no idea about any except for the most over-played and popular old songs. Another of the things that surprised me the same way is when G said (again in one of our chats) "swatIsaid" (translation: that's what I said) - which is what Ern Goon from The Five Find-Outers used to say. :)
   Also, G's ID on ICQ used to be Hawkeye. From Hawkeye Pierce in M*A*S*H, who I used to be absolutely in love with. :)
   
   
9. Maula Mere Maula from Anwar
   Beautiful, beautiful lyrics, and Rahat Fateh Ali Khan's awesome voice.


10. Tum Jo Mil Gaye Ho from Hanste Zakhm
    The most haunting romantic song I have ever heard. Gives me goosebumps every time I hear it. Kaifi Azmi's lyrics and Rafi's voice. Wow!
    
    
11. Mujhe Dard-e-Dil Ka Pata Naa Thaa from Akash Deep
    "yoon hi apne apne safar mein gum, kahin door mein kahin door tum...chale ja rahe thay juda juda, mujhe aap kisliye mil gaye..." Need I say any more? :)
    
    
12. Teri Deewani from Kailasa
    Not a Hindi film song, but such beautiful lyrics. And Kailash Kher sings it with such feeling.
    
    
13. Mann Re Tu Kaahe Naa Dheer Dhare from Chitralekha
    Outlook voted this as 1st out of the 20 best Hindi film songs ever. Not the best, I think. But, one of the best for sure!


14. There's this one song that I loooove! It's by Yesudas, as far as I remember. There's this one line in the song that goes - "samay ka aanchal thaam ke pal pal umar chali hai jaane kahaan..." - and I can't for the life of me remember tha title of the song, or any other words from it. Can someone please help me? 'Coz this is going to be driving me mad till I do remember which song this is from!!

Correction: Maula Mere Maula is not a Rahat Fateh Ali Khan song - it's actually sung by Roop Kumar Rathod. Still very nice though.

Tags: Also, I tag Quirky Soul, Anand, River, Anvita and the Mad Momma. Also, whoever else would like to take it up. :)

Another Update: I have finally managed to remember - with no help from anyone - which the last song I wrote about is! It's tere bin soona more mann ka mandir! :)

Not really "tagged"...

...but so what.

The Mad Momma had blogged about things that she's judgemental about, and that made me think. I've often thought that I get extremely judgemental about certain stuff. Have been meaning to do this post for a very long time now - but with work and then having such little time at home with G, it just hasn't happened.

So, all of the following are things that I judge people on, but none of these really matter in family and friends - they might strike me, but the thought's gone in a second...

1. I judge people who can't speak good English. I know that's extremely superficial, but when people use bad grammar, wrong tenses, or pronounce words wrong - it just puts me off.
2. I judge people who write sms-es without vowels or punctuation. How much time or effort does it take to type "I'll call you back"?! Why does it have to be "l cl u bk"??! I don't get it! Even apart from sms, I don't get why people have no idea how to use punctuation. Especially the apostrophe. It's always "it's" when it should be "its", and vice versa.
3. I also judge people who don't reply to sms-es, and are very proud of the fact that they "just don't like text messages". What's there to like or not like about technology? It makes life easier, it's an excellent way to communicate, and also - I've noticed that you can really know how a person's mind actually works with the way they type sms-es. You can always tell if a person is witty or just plain boring.
4. I judge people who do not read. Especially, if you tell me that you'd rather sleep than read a book. What kind of a logic is that?!
5. I judge people who aren't aware of popular culture - films, books, music, television. To not know who sang "With a little help from my friends", or what Woodstock was, or what Kumar Gaurav's first film was, or how Hum Aapke Hain Kaun changed the movie-watching experience, to who Salvador Dali was, to who Asterix is, or who Pran Kumar Sharma is, what Amar Chitra Katha is all about, or who Byomkesh Bakshi is, or turn your nose up at the thought of following the Harry Potter books - I just don't get any of this. All this isn't stuff that you have to try and find out about, or read about, or in any way, try and get to - it's popular culture, people! It's all around you.
6. I judge people who don't love their work, and think that it's alright to not be passionate about what you spend your life doing, just because at the end of the day you're getting paid for it.
7. I judge people who change when they're in a relationship. I've seen women and men becoming completely different people depending on who they're with. Especially in a marriage. To my mind, marriage is supposed to be about coming together. Not changing each other. That is what the word compromise means to a lot of people, I've noticed.
8. I judge people who think it's cool to not watch films. I have a relative who prides herself at the fact that she hasn't watched a single film in the last 17 years. Really??! How's that a cool thing?
9. I judge people - women actually - who change after having children. They stop being a woman, a wife, a daughter, a friend, an individual - just 'coz having had a child, having achieved the ultimate aim of their being - that's it for them. I completely understand, and respect, being there for your children, in every which way you can - that's the least you owe them for having brought them into the world. But, not to the exclusion of everything else. Not to the exclusion of not having a marriage anymore - in every sense of the word. I judge women who make their children the sole ambition of their lives - to wake them up, to put them to sleep, to cook for them, to even talk about them endlessly even when they aren't around, and to give up on themselves - on their personalities and on their bodies. To forget the people they were (and still are actually) just because society, in some way, tells them that they've finally done what they were around to do, and that's that.
10. I judge people who don't leave tips for waiters in restaurants, and/or think they have the right to speak badly with them. I also judge waiters who don't serve with a pleasant expression, and/or are rude and condescending, and still expect tips.

I think this is it. For now. This, though, is a post in progress. And I am one judgemental b****!

Would just like to say again though. This does not apply to my family and friends. Some of my closest and best-est friends use wrong grammar lots of time. My brother detests reading - there was a time when I would actually read out a whole Biggles novel to him, in the hope of maybe making him start to like reading. And, my husband doesn't believe in replying to my sms-es, and when he does, he writes full words thanks to predictive text, but does not use any punctuation ever. Sigh!

He dies slowly...

Who does not travel,
Who does not read,
Who does not listen to music,
Who does not enjoy himself.

He dies slowly...
Who destroys his self-esteem,
Who refuses the help of others.

He dies slowly...
Who becomes a slave of habit,
Repeating the same trajectory everyday.
Who will not change brands,
And dare not change the colour of his clothing.
Who will not converse with whom he does not know.

He dies slowly...
Who is afraid of passion
And the whirlwind of emotion,
That will return light to the eyes
And restore a broken heart.

He dies slowly...
Who does not change course when he is unhappy
At work or in his love-life,
Who will not take risks to pursue a dream,
Who will not, even once, take a chance.

Take a chance!
Live!
Do it today!
Don't let yourself die slowly!
Don't keep yourself from being happy!

- Pablo Neruda (poem translated from Spanish)

I'm feeling...

amused. :-D

Why, you ask?

'Coz I've spent the last month worrying and fretting over problems I thought I was having. Well, turns out, at least three more people have the same problems. And, that amuses me no end.

Erm...ok...that made no sense to most people...! Just stuff at work - that cannot be elaborated upon.

Oh, and yeah - back in office today. :)

Ah. Feeling so much better.

Back to office tomorrow. Been home since last Saturday.

Very nice evening yesterday. :)

My cats

...have absolutely no idea of regular sleep patterns or meal cycles.

This is Xena and Gabriel asleep - till 12:30 p.m. - on our bed - as G and I oversleep on a Saturday morning...

...One would think they'd wake up the time they usually do and be meowing for their fish and roti and waking us up...!!

I now HAVE to get out of the house!

It's been a week since I've been in bed - and have not ventured out; except for one night when I just HAD to get out for coffee late at night, and G drove me to the nearest Barista, but my back ache had started by the time we got there, so we came right back.

And, today - the first day that I'm feeling better, my husband is of no help at all - he's out handling a pub event for one of his clients. Meanwhile, I'm at home - hoping a friend leaves office in time, so he can come over and take me out for coffee.

..."manzil kuchh nahin hoti, thake jismon ko bharam hota hai"...

This is one of the most beautiful and poignant lines of poetry I've ever read.
The rest of the poem has to be read:

Kuchh to kaho meri dost
tum chup kyun ho...
waqt achha yaa bura
beet hee jaayega
hum to musaafir hain
ek ummeed liye,
koi lamha
kisi pardaao kaa nishan to laayega...

Kuchh to kaho meri dost...

Tum chup rahogi agar
mere azm ki anaa kya hogi
meri shohrat tumhari wahshat naa sahee
tumhare likhne se mere dil ko tasalli hogi...

Kuchh to kaho meri dost..

Manzil kuchh nahin hoti
thakey jismon ko bharam hota hai,
phir koi raah nikalti hai
phir chal detey hain
sirf pardaao aatey hain
nikal jaatey hain...
Phir chehre pe udaasi kaisi
kaali raat ki tarah
yeh chuppi kaisi...
khabar acchhi nahin
buri hee sahi
waqt hai yeh bhi
beet jaayega,
manzil kaa keh nahin saktey lekin
phir kisi pardaao kaa nishaan
kisi ummeed,
kisi muskan ki tarah
waqt bewaqt
chalaa hee aayega..

Kuchh to kaho meri dost...
tum chup kyon ho?

- Nilendu Sen

Ok, so now we know...

...what's wrong with my back!

I have developed Occupational Spondilosis. It's like, y'know how Tennis players get Tennis Elbow...kinda the same thing. Occupational Spondilosis happens with sitting at the computer for long hours - for many years. Can't be avoided really. The only thing that I can do to avoid another attack is to exercise my back and not lift very heavy weights, so it doesn't get affected this easily the next time.

Another cause for concern - I apparently have some deposits on the edges of my vertebra. It was thought to be Uric Acid deposits, but the blood test report shows that the level of Uric Acid in my blood is normal. So...well...!

Have spent the last week in bed. And since I've been lying in the weirdest of postures to keep my back from hurting, I now have a crick in my neck, which is not letting me turn my head to either side. Bugger!

So, basically - it's been a restful, but depressingly boring week. Tomorrow and day after though are G's days off. :)

Baaaaaaaaaaad Backache!

The Orthopaedic says it's something to do with decalcification of the back-bone. But, don't see how that's possible - considering Mom made Saahil and me have huge mugs of milk twice a day, every day. That was till I was living at home. It's been six years since I moved to Delhi - and the childhood torture of drinking milk everyday left such an imprint on my mind, that I still regularly have a huge mug of milk every morning. (Yep, I'm sure my kids will go through the same torture as well.)

But, the point is, where is all that Calcium going?! How can my backbone, of all the bones in my body, be decalcifying all of a sudden?! What happened to the rest of the 200-something bones?

Today's the second day I haven't been to work. And, I really should - have loads of work to finish!

New stuff on my blog...

1. I think this is very interesting. You match words to the picture that seems the most appropriate to you. And, the site tells you, what they call, your Visual DNA. Try it!
   
   
2. Another blog widget for your blog: LibraryThing. I've got it on mine. You can catalog your books on the site, and add a random list to your blog.
   
   
3. Punkymoods is the new avatar of the erstwhile Unkymoods. Love their graphics!
   
   
4. Another list on my blog is from the 43things. I've just got 16 things as yet. Get your own list of things you want to do.
   

Of a picnic...and a very bad backache...

At home today - with a very sore back. Today's the 4th day and the backache refuses to subside. Mom and G are finally making me go to the Orthopedic today.

Had a very fun time yesterday though. Took my cousins, and two of their friends for a picnic. We went to Humayun's Tomb. Had wanted to take S and K for a picnic since a long time. One, because they're two of the cutest and smartest kids I've ever known (...and I say this not 'coz they're my cousins! Believe me!). And two, 'coz I knew they'd love it, and so would I. The third (secret) reason was also that - well, lately - I have been thinking more and more about how I really want to have a baby. I know that we can't - right now. For various reasons. But, I really, really want to. And, this isn't a recent thing either - have always known I'd love to have a baby. And surprisingly, the whole "responsibility" thing doesn't scare me, like it does G. He's freaked out about me feeling this way, obviously. :D :D :D

All the kids, with G

That's the cutest lil' imp in the world - Ketaki

And, that's Siya

Aren't they the cutest? :)

Cold 'n' Hot

Overhead lights, in the fifth floor ladies' washroom, in the NDTV building

Pashemaani / A Sense of Regret

Main ye soch kar uske dar se uttha tha
Ki woh rok legi, manaa legi mujhko,

Hawaaon mein lehraata aata tha daaman
Ki daaman pakaD kar bittha legi mujhko,

Kadam aise andaaz se utth rahe thay
Ki aawaaz dekar bula legi mujhko,

Magar usne roka na mujhko manaaya
Na daaman hi pakDa na mujhko bitthaaya,

Na aawaaz hi di, na waapas bulaaya
Main aahista-aahista baDhta hi aaya,

Yahaan tak ki usse juda ho gaya main.

- Kaifi Azmi

Hausla / Courage

Tu khursheed hai, baadalon mein na chhup
Tu mehtaab hai, jagmagaana na chhoD

Tu shokhi hai shokhi, riaayat na kar
Tu bijli hai bijli, jalaana na chhoD

Abhi ishq ne haar maani nahin
Abhi ishq ko aazmaana na chhoD

- Kaifi Azmi


You are the sun, don't hide in the clouds
You are the moon, continue to shine.

You are mischievous seduction, don't let it subside
You are the lightning, continue to strike.

Love has not yet admitted defeat
Continue to test it, as much as you like.

Translation by Pavan K. Varma

Taj Mahal

In the wake of the recent mania concerning making The Taj part of the new Seven Wonders of the World - and, the fact that all Indian television and radio channels, and mobile phone operators are making tonnes of money with this - here's something from Sahir Ludhianvi:

taaj tere liye ik mazahar-e-ulfat hi sahi
tum ko is vaadi-e-rangeen se aqeedat hi sahi

[mazahar-e-ulfat = symbol of love; vaadi-e-rangeen = beautiful spot; aqeedat = respect/preference]

mere mehboob kaheen aur mila kar mujh se!

bazm-e-shaahi mein gareebon ka guzar kya maanee
sabt jis raah pe ho.n satavat-e-shaahi ke nishaan
us pe ulfat bhari ruuho.n kaa safar kya maani

[bazm-e-shaahi = royal court; sabt = etched]
[satavat-e-shaahi = royal grandeur; ulfat bhari ruuh = lovers]

meri mehboob pas-e-pardaa-e-tashheer-e-vafaa
tu ne satavat ke nishaano.n ko to dekha hota
murdaa shaaho.n ke maqaabir se bahalevaalee
apne taareek makaano.n ko to dekhaa hotaa

[pas-e-pardaa-e-tashheer-e-vafaa = behind the veil of this advertisement of faith/love] [satavat = wealth/grandeur; maqaabir (maqabaraa) = tomb; taareek = dark]

anaginat logo.n ne duniya mein mohabbat ki hai
kaun kehta hai ki saadiq na the jazbe un ke
lekin un ke liye tashheer ka saamaan nahin
kyun ke vo log bhi apni hi tarah mufalis the

[saadiq = true; tashheer = advertisement; mufalis = poor]

ye imaaraat-o-maqaabir ye faseele.n, ye hisaar
mutal-qulhukm shehenshaaho.n ki azamat ke sutuu.n
daaman-e-dahar pe us rang ki gulakaari hai
jis mein shaamil hai tere aur mere ajadaad kaa khoon

[hisaar = forts; mutal-qulhukm = unthinking/arrogant; azamat = greatness; sutuu.n = symbol]
[daaman-e-dahar = on the face of this world; gulakaari = flowers and vines; ajadaad = ancestors]

meri mehboob! unhein bhi to mohabbat hogi
jinki sannai ne bakhshi hai ise shakl-e-jameel
un ke pyaaron ke maqaabir rahe benaam-o-namuud
aaj tak un pe jalaayi na kisi ne qandeel

[sannai = artistry; shakl-e-jameel = beautiful form]
[benaam-o-namuud = without name or even a trace; qandeel = candle]

ye chamanzaar ye jamuna ka kinara ye mahal
ye munaqqash dar-o-deevaar, ye meheraab ye taaq
ik shehenshaah ne daulat ka sahara le kar
ham gareebo.n ki mohabbat ka udaayaa hai mazaak

[chamanzaar = garden; munaqqash = picturesque]

mere mehaboob kahin aur mila kar mujhse!